Face Only a Mother Could Love

My son is incredibly expressive both verbally and facially. This, I love. He shares these faces with most everyone he come into contact with, though most usually with those who are closest to him, those with whom he feels most comfortable. There is one face, though, that he reserves just for me – his breastfeeding face. You other breastfeeding mamas know the one I’m talking about. It’s a face unlike any other he makes. It’s a face only I can see.

My son’s face changes shape when he smiles, cries, laughs, or makes any other expression he comes up with – and he comes up with more all the time. It is an amazing thing to see. Sometimes his face looks tiny and small, sometimes it rounds out and fills up with teeth and cheeks. Sometimes his eyes look big and round, sometimes they look smooshed and squinty (generally accompanied by the aforementioned teeth and cheeks). Sometimes his mouth is petite with a perfect little Cupid's bow, sometimes his mouth is wide and stretched to the limit.

When he breastfeeds, though, his face takes on a whole new shape. It is at once small and full. His eyes are round and inquisitive and focused and peaceful. He gets these little smile lines around his mouth. It is, in my opinion, his most beautiful of all his beautiful faces. And nobody else has ever seen it but me. Nobody else will ever have my vantage point. Nobody else will ever get to share in our secret looks or in the messages we pass through our eyes. That face is one only I can love, because only I am blessed enough to see it. And oh, how I am blessed.

(My son, 4 months, and me doing a little extra loving during breastfeeding. I can't show you the face - that's just for me.)