I have to be very frank here, I used to be HORNY! I know that's a strong word, but nothing else will suffice in this case. I had no shortage of healthy hormones and sex drive. My married and parent friends used to stare in wonder at me and pat me on the back, for they were sure I would be the exception to their thought that everyone's sex life goes downhill after vows and kids.
Turns out, they were wrong. Horny be gone. Horny be LONG gone.
In reality, it was a short road trip from sex to sexless (or, at least, sex less often). IVF hormones did nothing to help. Pregnancy filled with 5 months of morning (read: all-day) sickness and the next 5 months of bed rest sealed that deal. I have now come to believe my sex drive checked into some seedy roadside motel and has yet to check out and return home. I have now come to believe it is never coming home.
That being the case, I asked my doctor about it. He actually gave me a bit of hope, saying that it would likely return upon cessation of breastfeeding in a few years (yes, he actually said a few years, because he is quite pro-breastfeeding for the normal term of 3-7 years). A postcard had arrived from my sex drive. It is indeed at that motel watching pay-per-view movies, but it wanted to let me know it was thinking of me and missed me. At least I know it's not dead in a gutter somewhere.
I've decided to help the situation in the only way I know how. If I could not breastfeed my son, I would get him a wet nurse. I'm considering doing the same thing (with a slightly different connotation) for my husband...