Sunday, March 16, 2014

30 Things Series #13: Hardest Part of Growing Up

Continuing with the series I'm writing, 30 Things My Son Should Know About Me, I give you my thoughts on the what is the hardest part of growing up.

Life isn't fair. What a suck-o statement. It has taken me my entire life to learn this lesson and, in honesty, I am still tripped up on it far too often. The hardest part of growing up, for me, has been learning, accepting that life isn't always fair. I'll let you know when I finish with this lesson.

My hope is that this won't be the hardest part of growing up for you. Shoot, my hope is that the hardest part of growing up for you is whether to play with Pinkie Pie or Wolverine. (Hint: you can't go wrong here.) This doesn't seem likely, so let me tell you some of what I've learned in this regard.

- it's not fair that when you're the good, hard worker, you get stuck with more of the work, because you're the one the person in charge trusts with it and the slackers get to continue to slack
- it's not fair that people will believe stories they hear about you without ever considering there are two three sides to every story
- it's not fair that you can't get student loans, because your parents make too much money, but your parents aren't supporting, because you've been living on your own since you were 18 but the federal loan department uses your parents' income to determine eligibility until you're 25
- it's not fair that you do what "they" tell you to do (get good grades, go to college, get a job) but can barely pay your bills, because your student loans are so oppressive, whereas your siblings dropped out of high school, got their GEDs and make three times the money you do without the debt
- it's not fair to be resented by a sibling for always being so "bossy," but the truth is you were put in charge of helping to raise him from the time you're a tiny child yourself
- it's not fair that good people die and truly evil people continue to live and wreak havoc
- it's not fair that little babies are strapped to boards to have their bodies cut upon while their cries or clinical shock is ignored, because they're not considered people with full rights
- it's not fair that people are users and will take advantage of you
- it's not fair that dads are considered "good" because they "let" you live with them, but moms are held to another standard entirely
- it's not fair that Peeps aren't considered health food
- it's not fair that student loan debt cannot be dismissed in a bankruptcy (Evidently, I think a lot about student loans are not fair, huh? Issues...)
- it's not fair that you can't choose your family
- it's not fair that children get sick, hurt, and die
- it's not fair that people pick on those unable to defend themselves
- it's not fair that your grandfather thought his job as a parent was over when your dad turned 18
- it's not fair that your dad works SO hard, SO many hours in TWO highly skilled jobs and has a master's degree, but STILL makes barely enough to keep us afloat every month, whereas people throw a ball into a hoop and make millions for it

I mean, honey, I could go on and on. A dang lot just isn't fair. And I have, many a time, gotten mired down by all that isn't fair. That has been my problem. The deal is - life just isn't fair. It's not. Accept it. Move on. Do what you know is right, because it's what is right and don't worry about all the rest that isn't fair. You can't control that. If you can, do. If you can't, accept it and continue doing what you know is right - all the time. YOU be the fair in the world.

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